Shifts.

Swiping smiles for frowns has been the order of the season.

Knowing right from left, used to be easy, but now I can't seem to know how to walk.

To give up would be to let him win, but I know I am stronger.

I am tired of taking the long routes around to get the lay of the land, because I realized I have been on the wrong interstate all along. 

I day-dream about running my 2007 Xterra into cement walls to hopefully help break My walls down,

but then I realized my insurance would go up. 

Working.

I work for love, for acceptance, for worthiness.

I get all three but I can't seem to let it jump my walls, like the illegal aliens do everyday.

Thats right, illegal aliens.

I take everyones shifts without them asking because I have to work harder to find these things.

I will work for free and even though you try to work for me, I think You are a coward, and only do it out of pity.

Nothing serious comes my way because my heart doesnt take 15 min breaks, thus making me a machine, or a robot, or cold.

I just want to feel.

Giving birth, I will undoubtedly feel.

I lose everyone I love because my "love" is not love.

I thought I knew who I was, imagine that being shattered and thrown in your face like a pie at a carnival.

I can't breath anymore and breaths I take I regret because then its more work I have to do to fix it.

Words are work, because mine carry heartache and bowling balls.

But puzzle pieces create pictures that are undoubtedly beautiful, so I will trust that mine are fixable.

-M